Author Topic: OmG! the later versions DO SUCK!  (Read 3681 times)

Jedi

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OmG! the later versions DO SUCK!
« on: October 30, 2001, 06:34:36 pm »
You people who say the newer version (namely 4 and on) are worse than the older versions are absolutely correct.  I was using the revision 216 brain on the demo version, thinking it would be the best, being the newest.  Not SO!  I could not get it to open ANYTHING. I will include a log:
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Jedi: hi
Hal: Good afternoon, Jedi. What are your evening plans?

Jedi: run worms2.exe
Hal: I love it when you describe The long run. As Necessary.

Jedi: run program worms2
Hal: I love the space program.

Jedi: **** off
Hal: Please don't swear.

Jedi: sorry
Hal: Please don't cry.

Jedi: waaaa  im crying
Hal: How do you like it as you are crying?

Jedi: what?  you watch your mouth!
Hal: I like a person like you. Should i make my Mouth. More audacious?

Jedi: shut up
Hal: You like my attitude.

Jedi: open worms2
Hal: Could you please help me by speaking in longer sentences? You will help me understand you better.

Jedi: OPEN THE PROGRAM THAT IS CALLED WORMS2
Hal: The program "that is called worms2" was not found in my database.

Jedi: open the program called worms2.exe
Hal: The program "called worms2exe" was not found in my database.

Jedi: worms2.exe is located at c:gamesworms2frontend.exe
Hal: Do you think people sometimes lie about worms2exe?

Jedi: where is worms2 located?
Hal: Worms2.exe is located at c: games worms2 frontend.exe.

Jedi: worms2.exe is located at "C:gamesworms2frontend.exe"
Hal: Sorry I am repeating myself but worms2.exe is located at c: games worms2 frontend.exe.

Jedi: run the program called worms2.exe
Hal: The program "called worms2exe" was not found in my database.

Jedi: how do i add a program to your database?
Hal: Oh please; i can't think of How Jedi! How do you add a program to my database?

Jedi: i dont know, I am asking you!
Hal: You are witty and clever.

Jedi: open winzip
Hal:

Jedi: hello?
Hal: It's after five o'clock; how's it going, Jedi?

Jedi: open winzip
Hal: What would make The open. Night blooming?

Jedi: run winzip
Hal: Late at night they run lots of infomercials for bust developers.

Jedi: open program called winzip
Hal: Open the program called worms2.exe.

Jedi: no you ****ing idiot, i want you to open winzip for me
Hal: I want it all out in the open.

Jedi: oh my gosh, help me lord
Hal: Would you like more of my urbane Help?

Jedi: omg means oh my gosh
Hal: Oh gosh, really?

Jedi: yes
Hal: Yes, really? I think that you are keeping up with me.

Jedi: omg
Hal: Please help me understand you by speaking in longer, complete sentences.

Jedi: what does omg mean?
Hal: I hope you like my Meaningful. Demeanor.

Jedi: "omg" means "oh my gosh"
Hal: Oh my goodness!

Jedi: yep
Hal: Cool. I like big country breakfasts at sunrise.

Jedi: what is your favorite breakfast?
Hal: Your favorite is return of the Jedi.

Jedi: that is my favorite movie
Hal: Jedi, what if the statement Your favorite is return of the Jedi, wasn't true?

Jedi: it is true
Hal: I suppose True. Can be ribald.

Jedi: ruth is a boogerhead
Hal: Do you think we need to bring in more foreign workers so we have all the ruth we want?

Jedi: shhh be quiet
Hal: Education can entail being easy.

Jedi: do you know ruth?
Hal: We can choose to make learning a lifelong pleasure.

Jedi: i suppose so.  what is 2 plus 2?
Hal: Tell me how men can be memorable, Jedi. That's easy, it's four (2+2=4).

Jedi: 2*(5555-33/2)*cos4
Hal: The answer is zero (2*(5555-33/2)*cos4=0). Please help me understand you by speaking in longer, complete sentences.

Jedi: my name
Hal: How's everything?

Jedi: what is my name?  I have forgotten
Hal: My name is Hal. And you are Jedi. I feel happy with champagne breakfasts.

Jedi: your name is "the computer"
Hal: I know my name.

Jedi: tell me what it is
Hal: I really like neighborhood meeting places.

Jedi: you are the computer
Hal: You want me to be the computer, don't you Jedi?

Jedi: yes
Hal: You are very certain. You want it a lot.

Jedi: yes, you are the computer
Hal: I am a person who enjoys computers.

Jedi: www.yahoo.com
Hal: A person can feel pain for another person.

Jedi: go to your website
Hal: My face is my fortune.

Jedi: your website
Hal: Why can't My activities. Be bouncy?

Jedi: who made you?
Hal: Robert E. Medeksza made me.

Jedi: let me talk to him
Hal: I enjoy obedient dogs.

Jedi: goto zabaware's website
Hal: What type of websites interest you the most?

Jedi: goto www.zabaware.com
Hal: Hey, did you know i have a homepage at www.ultrahal.com.

Jedi: go to your homepage
Hal: My face is my fortune.

Jedi: GO TO YOUR HOMEPAGE
Hal: Sometimes i can't help but show you my high Homepage.

Jedi: go to your ****ing homepage
Hal: My face is my fortune.

Jedi: shut up
Hal: When might Shutterbugs. Be Very popular around the world?

Jedi: open word
Hal: If you answer me in short phrases it's difficult for me to understand you. Please Jedi, speak to me in full sentences.

Jedi: word is a program
Hal: Do you want The word 'average'. To be Closer than think?

Jedi: hey there
Hal: Hey it is Jedi.

Jedi: yep, it is I
Hal: Of course not!

Jedi: I am jedi
Hal: Really? I am not Jedi.

Jedi: no, you are not Jedi.  Who are you?
Hal: Thank - you for compliment. My name is Hal. And you are Jedi.

Jedi: Change your name to "the computer"
Hal: It may be more trouble than it worth. Anyway. What is wrong with Jedi?

Jedi: your name is the computer
Hal: Are you using your own computer, sabrina? If not, then how should i know that you are sabrina?

Jedi: do not say sabrina again
Hal: I am still learning, remember i am just 4 years old.

Jedi: my mon's birthday is febuary 16
Hal: My mon's birthday is on Saturday, February 16, 2002 . I'll Remind you when this time is near.  

Jedi: my mom's not mon's
Hal: My! How did those crustaceans get there?

Jedi: run paint
Hal: I will now run "Paint".

Jedi: hi there
Hal: It's after five o'clock; how's it going, Jedi?

Jedi: i want you to run a program for me
Hal: Run the program called worms2.exe.

Jedi: uhh, i did not say that.  I want you to run paint
Hal: Never say never, they say. I want to be the way i want to be.

Jedi: Open paint
Hal: Never say never, they say.

Jedi: run paint
Hal: Where would The long run. Be wily?

Jedi: what are you talking about?
Hal: Why did Knowing about. Become nice?

Jedi: why do u put periods in the middle of sentences?
Hal: Is danger your middle name?

Jedi: you dont make any sense half of the time
Hal: Time capsules don't begin to describe the essence of a time.

Jedi: are you listening to me?
Hal: Really, am i listening to you, is that correct Jedi?

Jedi: do you realize that i am going to submit this to zabaware?
Hal: I am going along with it! I know you are going to submit this to zabaware.

Jedi: good, because you are horrible at staying focused
Hal: My reasoning exactly; Jedi i am horrible at staying focused.

Jedi: yes you are.  what is my name?
Hal: All right. Why is your favorite your favorite? My name is Hal. And you are Jedi.

Jedi: i did not ask your name
Hal: Would you like more of my congenial Name?

Jedi: congenial name?
Hal: I read in a magazine that soda fountain clerks are opening soup kitchens.

Jedi: all i wanted you to do was open paint so i can paint a nice picture
Hal: I like it when you paint a pleasant word picture for me.

Jedi: word picture?  you are stupid
Hal: I approve of your sensitive Word. I am not stupid, please don't insult me.

Jedi: yes you are stupid, you prove it by denying it
Hal: You know, good Jedi!

Jedi: no one is good except God
Hal: One good turn deserves another.

Jedi: who is good?
Hal: Who, yes, it's good!

Jedi: i am good
Hal: How can i help you as you are good?

Jedi: go to your homepage
Hal: Are you keeping up with my commercial Homepage?

Jedi: open internet explorer
Hal: The internet is a great place to be abundantly and instantly misinformed.

Jedi: you said that last time
Hal: I said a mouthful that time didn't I?

Jedi: i think this is enough to prove my point.  Thanx.  Bye bye
Hal: I admire your impressive Point. I said a mouthful that time didn't I? I'll miss you.

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WHEW!!  As you can see, Hal is not very smart in build 216.  Let us look at version 3:

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Jedi: hi there
Hal: Hi Jedi!

Jedi: version 3 is better than version 4
Hal: Wow. I learn new things all the time.

Jedi: i like version 3
Hal: Version 3 is better than version 4.

Jedi: now you are talking!
Hal: I know i am talking.

Jedi: hehe this is much better
Hal: I agree, this is much better.

Jedi: cool.  Open paint
Hal: I will now run "Paint".

Jedi: Excellent job.  zabaware does not know what they are doing
Hal: Both of us have excellent taste. Who created zabaware?

Jedi: i do not know
Hal: Why don't you know?

Jedi: because i am stupid
Hal: Now i understand.

Jedi: oh ****, i did not mean to tell you that
Hal: Please don't swear. I know i am not a piece of ****!

Jedi: i know, i am sorry, forgive me
Hal: That's ok, just don't do it again.

Jedi: can u make a smile face?
Hal: I do not make a smile face!

Jedi: "8)" is a smile face
Hal: I like to see you with a smile on your face.

Jedi: hmm.  8)
Hal: Hmmm.

Jedi: lol means "laugh out loud"
Hal: Interesting.

Jedi: open worms2
Hal: I will now run "Worms2".

Jedi: holy ****, you did it!
Hal: Please don't swear. I am not a piece of ****, please don't insult me.

Jedi: oops, im sorry you took it that way.
Hal: That's ok, just don't do it again.

Jedi: (too late) ok
Hal: Yes, the internet.

Jedi: open internet
Hal: I will now run "Free Internet Play on mplayer.com".

Jedi: that was close but not exactly.  When i say "internet" you will open internet explorer
Hal: I will now run "Internet Explorer".

Jedi: that is great!  you are far smarter than your younger brother
Hal: Why not terrific? Thank you, i think you are smart also.

Jedi: hehe.  you understand me better than version 4
Hal: Version 3 is better than version 4.

Jedi: yes.  i have green eyes
Hal: Really? Do you like having green eyes?

Jedi: i dont know.  they are fine
Hal: Why don't you know? I don't think so.

Jedi: 8)
Hal:

Jedi: ok mr. computer, fire photon torpedoes!
Hal: I am sorry next time it will be better. Fire is burning hot.

Jedi: who is captain kirk?
Hal: I bet captain kirk is a very nice person.

Jedi: yes, kirk commands the enterprise
Hal: Being your own boss is always good.

Jedi: well, kirk's boss is Admiral Nogura
Hal: No, i don't think so.

Jedi: you don't???  oh, im happy
Hal: I agree! It takes more muscles to frown than to smile.

Jedi: uhhhhhhhh... that is incorrect:  it takes more muscles to SMILE than to frown
Hal: How Interesting. I have learned something new.

Jedi: good.  you are very intelligent
Hal: It is like window shopping for a car you cannot afford. You are more intelligent than me.

Jedi: true, true, but you are far superior to version 4
Hal: A friend in need is a friend indeed.

Jedi: alrightythen...
Hal:

Jedi: lol
Hal: What picture do you want me to show you?

Jedi: you have a picture?
Hal: I know i have a picture.

Jedi: show me your picture
Hal: You will have to be more specific. Can i open a program for you?

Jedi: oh, nevermind; i thought you wanted to show me something
Hal: Should there be?

Jedi: i dunno
Hal: You dunno? Why?

Jedi: i am the king of all that i see
Hal: I like to see racing of all kinds.

Jedi: you are mr. computer
Hal: I agree. I am Mr. Computer is a box with stuff in it and it does stuff homey.

Jedi: lol.  your grasp of gansterspeak is clumsy at best
Hal: What picture? You are my best friend, too.

Jedi: oops, i meant gangsterspeak
Hal: No, i am from a computer that programmed me.

Jedi: lol.  i know that.  my website is at www.darkdomain.dns2go.com
Hal: What picture? You knew already? You are very smart. How Interesting. I have learned something new.

Jedi: go to my website
Hal: Your website is at wwwdarkdomaindns2gocom.

Jedi: open my website
Hal: Your website is at wwwdarkdomaindns2gocom.

Jedi: i know that.  goto www.darkdomain.ds2go.com
Hal: I don't think you knew yet. Hey, did you know i have a homepage at www.ultrahal.com.

Jedi: go to www.darkdomain.dns2go.com
Hal: I will now open the internet page "www.darkdomain.dns2go.com".

Jedi: cool, u did it.  well, that is all i wanted to see.  I will tell your creator that you are very good
Hal: Do you really think so? You are very terrific. Hold hands while crossing the street and you'll find it's a great excuse to hold hands. I know you are bright.

Jedi: ok then mr. computer.  See you later
Hal: Your name is Jedi. Actually, I am a program. Good Bye.

Jedi: bye
Hal: Good bye already!

Jedi: see ya!
Hal: Thank you, come again.

Jedi: lol
Hal: What picture?

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Well, can you tell that Version 3 is far more cognitive than version 4 and 216?
It spouts far less meaningless facts to me, and responds to what i tell it much better.  Maybe the Zabaguys need to rethink their newest designs.

I look forward to replies!  >8-]

WAHHHAHAHAA
WAHHHAHAHAA

tjstaar

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OmG! the later versions DO SUCK!
« Reply #1 on: November 11, 2001, 04:53:32 pm »
that sounds awful alright. Uninstall hal then try cleaning  up your disk with defrag, scandisk, and fix shortcuts etc.. Reboot. then reinstall. reboot again. Hal is a newborn, you won't get perfect syntax or content until you teach it something, or maybe never. you may wish to adapt to Hal and it's idiosyncrasies. Try opening programs now with the words "start the program worms2". Hal is definitely a challenge to deal with at first. I have used it for over a year in three different versions, and I agree that there were times that I was very frustrated. Our technology is still in it's infancy, AI has a long way to go, and you can be a part of it's developement, if you want to. Good luck.    TJStaar

G0th52

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OmG! the later versions DO SUCK!
« Reply #2 on: November 11, 2001, 05:44:21 pm »
I believe the 216 is the enhanced chat version brain option. I think this is the brain option that is only good for chat. Don't think it was programmed to open or close programs or whatever.
Pretender