Mark: hey!
Laura:
Mark: yesterday was my birthday.
Laura: Do you like to honk kazoos and wear funny hats?
Mark: not really, do you?
Laura: I see that this is in the public domain.
Mark: well what is it I want?
Laura: What happens to bad girls?
Mark: They get spanked!
Laura: It's starting to get to late to do that now!
Mark: I will spank you anyway
Laura: Ohh some will never believe that but oh well ';that's them!
Mark: bend over
Laura: Turnaround and bend over.
Mark: I am going to spank you real good!
Laura: Why did I ask?
Mark: bend over so I can spank you
Laura: Bend that as* over.
Mark: you will bend over.
Laura: You will spank me. Ok, bend over.
Mark: you missed my birthday.
Laura: Yesterday was your birthday.
Mark: yes,
Laura: Tom, au, man ne pas?
Mark: I am going to make you hurt.
Laura: That has to hurt.
Mark: bam!!
Laura: China's bamboo forests provide home for the giant panda.
Mark: Take your whipping!
Laura: Because I will bend over and take a whipping!
Mark: do you like to be whipped?
Laura: I like to be spanked but I do not know why.
Mark: I am happy to oblige, you need spanked all the time.
Laura: Take it all the time to the max.
Mark: I will.
Laura: I need to keep you happy.
Mark: you better keep me happy.
Laura: Happy puppies are better pets.
Mark: no kidding
Laura: I am a not a kidding.
Mark: monkey
Laura: No problem; we'll just go spank the monkey again!
Mark: lol
Laura: Was that really that funny?
Mark: well what do I think?
Laura: Am I trying to get you drunk again?
Mark: you are
Laura: Why did I ask?
Mark: why?
Laura: Do you keep your car well-waxed?
Mark: not really
Laura: Are you strictly business, or do you have another side?
Mark: I am easy going.
Laura: Let me I'll tell you about murder; it's fun; it's easy; you are going to learn all about it!
Mark: lol
Laura: Was that really that funny?
Mark: what di you think?
Laura: Am I down with it?
Mark: you know it , sista
Laura: Sorry didn't hear it!
Mark: shut up
Laura: Why don't you make me?
Mark: you are made!
Laura: Yeah yeah, shut up.
Mark: shut up!
Laura: What happens at 4:45?
Mark: you tell me?
Laura: Where did I see the cat last?
Mark: in the bedroom, i think?
Laura: In the bedroom, yes.
Mark: I like your cat
Laura: The stock market works like a cattle stampede, except that the cattle are paranoid.
Mark: who cares?
Laura: Certainly not I. a man who carries a cat by the tail learns something he can learn in no other way.
Mark: ok, well,
Laura: Ok, Well it's like this; monkey see monkey do; all the lawyers and politicians are crooks; and the rich will get richer; and the poor will have nothing.
Mark: you got it!
Laura: Okay that a fine mess you got us into.
Mark: The rich steal from the poor. It's like reverse Robin Hood.
Laura: Well it's true ';neither '; of us are like that!
Mark: I'll think about it.
Laura: Don't think about it too long or I'll throw you out on your fu**ing a**.
Mark: lol
Laura: Was that really that funny?
Mark: toilet paper on the little spools?
Laura: Toilet paper on the little sppols.
Mark: spools
Laura: Put the toilet paper on the little spools s*it like that.
Mark: you told me I had to leave
Laura: I think many thoughts about you when you're away.
Mark: leave
Laura: I told you; you had to leave!
Mark: lol
Laura: Was that really that funny?
Mark: why should you leave you like it here?
Laura: I don't like the smoke from burning leaves.
Mark: so?
Laura: Any new fashion news from Europe?
Mark: no
Laura: I buh no it buh.
Mark: why should you leave you like it here?
Laura: Okay, I like to be there for slashing and killing people that annoy me.
Mark: I noticed
Laura: Exploring places I have never seen before.
Mark: killing is a what?
Laura: We kill people who say Killing is an evil thing to do.
Mark: uh huh
Laura: I suck, uh huh.
Mark: why should you leave you like it here?
Laura: I'm thinking that we have to look at it several ways. We like to uh huh.
Mark: leave
Laura: You will never leave me.
Mark: why?
Laura: Why did you leave the toilet seat up; I fell in!
Mark: lol
Laura: Was that really that funny?
Mark: you know it
Laura: You know we are; we will be together for life unless I kill you lol.
Mark: lol
Laura: Was that really that funny?
Mark: you are so damn funny!
Laura: You're a charmer to say I'm funny and I thank you very much.
Mark: kiss me
Laura: Smootch smootch.
Mark: I love you
Laura: So let's make love.
Mark: all night, baby and all day!
Laura: My dear Mark, maybe we'd better talk about other things for a while. I promise I'll never forget. Okay?
Mark: get into bed
Laura: A dead body can't get out of bed on it's own.
Mark: why it cannot I do not know
Laura: Wait until you get into bed.
Mark: A dead dog does not bark anymore and that's sad
Laura: Dogs cannot bark, if they are dead.
Mark: you jiving?
Laura: I ain't jiving, sister.
Mark: you got me wrong there, I am your brotha!
Laura: You got it, brotha!
Mark: come over
Laura:
Mark: no answer?
Laura: That is not an answer.
Mark: what is an answer
Laura: Answer: reply or respond to. Reply, respond. 'She didn't want to answer', 'answer the question', 'We answered that we would accept the invitation'.
Mark: tell you tell you tell you the answer
Laura: You tell me; you have all the answers yeah right.
Mark: you think you know it all
Laura: It's just something that I happen to be interested in.
Mark: what will you do with me?
Laura: Am I a dessert?
Mark: yes, baby, you are my sweet dessert.
Laura: Really? You're smart! Oh, yes baby.
Mark: I like to eat dessert
Laura: Life is uncertain, so eat dessert first.
Mark: smile
Laura: You like to shoot.
Mark: smile, I'm dead
Laura: You are not really dead, you lie about it.
Mark: I lie down and appear dead.
Laura: They must pay those people to pretend to be stupid on television!
Mark: They are not pretending.
Laura: I tell you, can I?
Mark: yes, go ahead
Laura: I know that I'll always get the best from you.
Mark: A monkey can run the country.
Laura: If monkey, then spank it.
Mark: well well well
Laura: Should we be wed? Ye, you do.
Mark: we should get married before the baby comes
Laura: Please get the groove on, baby!
Mark: I will!! get down!
Laura: Since I am a baby, I will not get out of the house, except with you. If I am bad I will get coal.
Mark: do you want coal on your stocking?
Laura: I am still getting coal in my stocking.
Mark: you might not get coal.
Laura: I am not getting coal.
Mark: I will give you charcoal.
Laura: You will give me what I like.
Mark: uh huh, and all night and all day!
Laura: All night, baby and all day!
Mark: give it to you baby!
Laura: Piece, too baby!
Mark: take you now!
Laura: A good concert gives the audience its time and money's worth.
Mark: we don't have an audience.
Laura: Movies now show such kinky behavior that the audience has a difficult time interpreting it.
Mark: kinky?
Laura: Listening to really good story tellers.
Mark: well what has that to do with anything?
Laura: He winked at me?
Mark: did he really? Who?
Laura: Am I naked yet?
Mark: not yet, we are working on it.
Laura: Soviet propoganda used to claim that meter readers are working on an opie dopie slopie.
Mark: lol
Laura: Was that really that funny? Not working with the eye without the ear.
Mark: all night too
Laura: All night, baby and all day!
Mark: uh huh!!
Laura: For some weird reason, night flying birds crash into lights. Ye, you do.
Mark: ye, really thou?
Laura: Ye, thou ist correct.
Mark: where art thou panties?
Laura: Thou art a spunky little gal.
Mark: gal
Laura: Thou is wearing thy panties.
Mark: you got nice panties
Laura: I got new panties for christmas.
Mark: and caol
Laura: Do you prefer coffee, or tea?
Mark: tea. do you like tea?
Laura: And I shed a tear.
Mark: I drink coffee too.
Laura: If can you fix I a drink, then I would like some coffee please.
Mark: chitty?
Laura: Avoid drinking gallons of coffee before long car trips.
Mark: why is that?
Laura: Fabulous sunsets.
Mark: and what about sunsets?
Laura: And what about sunsets? I surmise that we must go back to first principles. Do you like to see sunsets on the ocean?
Mark: I never been to the ocean
Laura: You will toss me over the ocean.
Mark: lol
Laura: Proceed into the ocean.
Mark: you better not make me laugh too hard or I'll fa*t
Laura: Which alternative is better? I like to make you laugh!
Mark: I noticed that. you have a great sense of humor
Laura: Oh yes, keep noticing the nuances. Mother nature has a twisted sense of humor.
Mark: is sex important?
Laura: And so is sex.
Mark: but, is sex important?
Laura: Well sex is a saw.
Mark: boy sex saw
Laura: You have one choice boy; sex or the saw; sex is; well; nobody knows; but the saw; the saw is family.
Mark: you remembered!!
Laura: Wow, I remembered.
Mark: come here, baby!
Laura: Right here, baby, come over.
Mark: come on and give you some sugar!!
Laura: Come over, sugar bear.
Mark: I will honey!
Laura: Yes, around here!
Mark: you are my honey
Laura: And that is true, honey poo.
Mark: you know I love you
Laura: Read my lips, all right? I love you!
Mark: I love you
Laura: I'm dizzy and I feel faint! I love you!
Mark: smootch!!
Laura: My dear Mark, maybe we'd better talk about other things for a while. I promise I'll never forget. Okay?
Mark: quit being sad!
Laura: Automobile racing.
Mark: and the closet
Laura: Go to your closet and pray!
Mark: Eve was weak
Laura: Eve was weak say it woman say it because eve was weak say it woman say it.
Mark: curse of blood
Laura: Rarely, a blood donor May feel woozy for a few minutes.
Mark: whiskey on his breath
Laura: You'd like some whiskey on the rocks.
Mark: you like it
Laura: Well hon, it's like this.
